


Somtaaw Shenanigans

by rompafrolic



Category: Homeworld
Genre: Gen, Kiith Somtaaw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2020-12-28 07:43:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21133133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rompafrolic/pseuds/rompafrolic
Summary: Somtaaw up to their old tech-tricks again





	1. Somtaaw Shenanigans 1

Raan Nabaal looks up from the sheet of paper in front of him. It’s too early for dealing with Kiith Somtaaw salvager crews. This is the fifth incident this week, and it’s only Thursday. Raan has a true and real fear of what the next three days will deliver him. Not least because Somtaaw typically get roaring drunk on their days off and attempt insane “improvements” to anything and everything within plasma torch range. The less said about their never ending “holy days” the better. The stains are still there from the last one. Hopefully this new incident won’t cause too many problems, but the likelihood is slim. He starts reading. The hope disappears like desert dew before the scorching morning sun.

Raan leans down to his comm. “Laaya, please send in Maasi Somtaaw.” The click when he releases the button is loud despite the rumbling of Kapisi around him. He can only thank He Whose Hand Shapes for the small mercy that the Jaraci War is long over.

Shortly there is a knock at the door. Raan mutters “enter” from behind his head-cradling hands. There is no answer. Raan sighs and straightens up from his despair. “Enter”, he says more clearly. Already his training as chief of the deck crew is taking over, pushing aside despair at Somtaaw, for now at least.

“Sir.”, the Somtaaw salvager seems halfway between defiant and contrite, almost as though the latest ‘incident’ is non-existent. Almost as though Raan were singling him out unfairly.

“Take a seat Maasi. Please.” The salvager sits in one of the two chairs across the desk from Raan.

Raan sighs again. “How many times have you been here this month?” he asks.

Maasi scratches his head, perhaps a little embarrassed. “Uh, four times I think sir, not counting the party for the sixth temple holiday.”

“Indulge me for a minute, let us pretend I don’t know why you’re here. What would you say it’s about?”

“The SJF-17 power couplings? No. The fact we’re having trouble with turbine number 2 in loading bay 2? No. Uh. I’m gonna be straight boss, I got no clue.”

“It’s because of this, Maasi.” Raan pushes the slip of paper across the desk, folding his arms as he waits for Maasi to work his way down the document.

“Uh. The seventeenth, that was, uh, four days ago, right?”

“Yes.”

“Uh, Light Cruiser Korum, out of action, uh, uh-huh. Wait what. Boss it says they’re ‘blaming’ it on us? What does that mean?”

“Four Somtaaw salvage crews, not you alone. And yes, they are ‘blaming’ you.” He emphasises the word with finger quotes.

“Yeah, boss, that’s what I don’t get. Why are we being blamed? It’s not like the cruiser’s dead, is it? Oh shit, don’t tell me the power couplings on the Korum have fucked up too.”

“No, the cruiser is fine. The crew on the other hand, are not. As of four days ago, they have only two of the four bunkrooms they’re supposed to. As of four days ago their power plant is making, and I quote ‘creepy Gaalsien noises’. As of four days ago THE WHOLE DAMN THING IS FLOATING 3 METRES OFF THE SAJUUK-DAMN DESERT FLOOR!”

“Oh.”

“Don’t you fucking ‘Oh’ me.”

“But boss. Command didn’t want to use the salvage for anything.”

“No, please.”

“And me and the crews had a think.”

“No, please, Sajuuk no.”

“And there were those complaints about the reactor output being really good. And the treads were wearing out.”

…

“So we decided to whack those hover units onto the front treads of Korum, so that we could use the spare parts to repair the rear treads, but then we figured that the power was a bit tight, so we added a third reactor chamber and rewired the air con. But then we ran into a problem with the front being higher than the rear, and we thought the crew would prefer working in a flat ship, so we whacked a couple of spare units, you know the big dome-y ones from the K’Had Sajuuk wreck, onto the rear. And yeah I guess that from the right angle it looks like a pair of tits, but it floats flat as the southern seas now.”

“Shut up.”

“Shutting up, boss”

“Because of you I have not just one Kiith-sa breathing down my neck, but two.”

“Uh.”

“I said shut up.”

Maasi nods quietly.

“Here is what is going to happen. You and your crews, yes, all forty of you, are going to take that Qwaar-Jet cursed cruiser out for trials. I am not giving you any spare parts. I am not giving you Support Cruiser logistics.” Raan reaches under his desk. “This is your order docket. This is signed by both the captain *and* the head of the science crew. If I ever see you on my flight deck or in my loading docks again I will personally throw you all off the rear of the carrier while we’re on a deep desert patrol. Is this understood?”

“Yes boss.”

“Good. Now fuck off.”

Maasi quietly stands and leaves the small office, a look of puzzlement on his face, wondering how on earth he’s going to fit forty crew onto a cruiser with only ten bunks. Raan waits until the door has clicked shut before collapsing into himself again.

Why oh why did they have to do it just before a parade for the groundside inauguration for the Sajuuk-damned scaffold? And why did that damn cruiser crew not just shut up about their new bits? And why, oh why, did Roman _fucking_ S’Jet have to be on the bridge alongside Rachel S’Jet and his own damned Kiith-sa? It was enough to drive a man into the deep desert. Again.


	2. Somtaaw Shenanigans 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raan and Maasi return!

There is a certain stillness when Kapisi is at rest. Its engines never truly shut down. Protocol insists on one reactor always being active at any time, and at this moment all four are active, if only at minimal power. The deck plates do not thrum with power as they do while underway. The deck does not pitch to strange angles as dunes are mounted, for the ship is immobile. There is not the thud of the aircraft catapults, not the ringing of alarms, nor the distant, though muted, sounds of firing weapons. There is only a tenseness in the air, of a coiled beast ready to spring.

To Raan Nabaal this feeling is peace. It is the quietness that is prelude to true action. It is the time that lets him allow rest to his crews. It is the time to do the bloody paperwork. Again.

On the lower reardeck Maasi Somtaaw contemplates the distant mountains. They seem a little too far away for him to be comfortable. These are not the mountains of the Shimmering Path, those are almost on the other side of the planet from here, but they are mountains. And to all Somtaaw the mountains are home, mountains are security. It is fortunate for Maasi that he does not particularly crave either. Some Somtaaw are serving on Kapisi live in perpetual homesickness. Instead he wonders at what secrets and prayers are hidden in the secret valleys of those distant peaks. Kapisi is a mountain of its own, but Maasi has explored her. She has no hidden valleys, no secret springs.

The air in the long evening sun is warm, but cooling to hint at the night-time cold. On this deck Maasi will not feel the cold for several hours, even if he was wearing nothing. Kapisi takes care of her crew.

There are three things in life which truly are the pleasures of Raan Nabaal. The first of these is tidiness. His quarters are always spotless, even after he has somehow seduced the flight deck chief. His principal pleasure of the week is to inspect his charges and find them clear and clean and shipshape. To find that all four hangar decks are in this way sets him at ease with the world.

His second pleasure is in the good running of Kapisi. Or rather, the good running of all mechanical things. He can ignore the mess of a difficult repair so long as it is successful. He can live with harsh conditions and the threat of battle. But only if his babies, his dear and much loved battlecraft are working. But this is not a simple ‘if it works it’s fine’, no. Raan Nabaal earned his position through long years of experience, though almost guaranteeing the perfect running of any vehicle given to him, up to and including the now venerable Kapisi herself. Raan is justifiably proud of himself, his work, and his subordinates.

Raan’s final pleasure in life is to not receive *any* report, for a minimum of a week, concerning the activities of a certain Maasi Somtaaw. Naturally this latest report ensures that Raan will not only receive no pleasure, but have his major pleasures turned away from him. Raan has somehow trashed all four hangars, caused near-irreparable damage to three vehicles, and caused today’s report to land on Raan’s desk. Those with good hearing near Raan’s office hear gentle sobbing on days like these. They make no comment, lest they incur the wrath of his latest lover.

Maasi Somtaaw has three pleasures in life. Well, actually that’s a bit of a lie. He has many pleasures, but for a moment let’s assume these three are his main pleasures. First he likes going fast. Second he likes letting his curiosity get the better of him. Third he likes worshipping Sajuuk in his own particular way. Worship on Kharak by Somtaaw is typically a quiet affair, murmured prayers, written prayer papers, incense in front of a shrine, offerings to the honoured dead. Not for Somtaaw are the loud chants of Gaalsien, nor the acts of contrition of Siidim. Maasi is something of an exception in this regard. This latest incident (the report of which is currently about to land in Hangar Chief Raan Nabaal’s IN tray) is in some bizarre way a fulfilment of these three pleasures.

“Laaya.” Raan leans down to his comm.

“Yes Boss?”

“Why is there another report about Maasi fucking Somtaaw on my desk?”

“Well, boss, uh, he did a thing. Again.”

This particular day see Maasi Somtaaw and his crew of ne’er-do-wells in their trusty salvager approaching a dead Gaalsien Production Cruiser. Though Production Cruiser is a misnomer in all truth; it serves as a smaller command and control and resource hub for Gaalsien strike forces, nothing is truly ‘produced’ in one, except perhaps battle strategies and spare parts. This particular wreck has been cleared by Kapisi’s marine detachment a handful of minutes previously, making it, at least in theory, perfectly safe for Maasi and company.

It is therefore not a surprise to those familiar with Maasi to see a streak of dust tipped by something black leave the wreck a mere ten minutes after the salvagers make contact.

“Spell it out for me Laaya, please. That way I won’t have to do… something.” Raan adopts a now familiar position, his face cradled in his hands, gently rocking to and fro.

“So, you know that Gaalsien wreck the marines cleared? Well Maasi was assigned to it, as were crews 3 through 5. Maasi’s is crew 2.”

“Yes I know.”

“Well. Uh. It seems, boss, that instead of stripping the wreck of anything usable, well, they immediately unhooked one of the hover modules.”

“What?”

“I said, boss, that they unhooked-“

“Yes I heard you that was my sheer unstoppable disbelief, not… fuck it. Carry on.”

“Uh, well they unhooked on of the hover modules. And-“ Paper rustles as Laaya seems to organise the report’s pages. “-and they hooked a portable generator rig to it. And then they tied some of the safety cables to it.”

The hot desert air is currently somewhat less hot in the wake of the hover module. In fact it’s almost pleasant for Maasi Somtaaw. And that makes this good day some several miles better. Not only did he worship Sajuuk through engineering (a somewhat flimsy worship really) but it was via him being curious! And on top of that he also is now going pretty damn fast, possibly faster than a Light Assault Vehicle, possibly. Unfortunately his newest vehicle, blessed with an impressive top speed, has no speedometer, which naturally takes a slight edge of his excitement.

“Kapisi’s forward Point Defence sensors were what first ‘saw’ him, boss. Uh he was doing almost double the top cruising speed of a LAV, boss. And, uh, he was doing it on a piece of sheet metal from that wreck’s hull.”

Raan’s coffee survives this particular encounter only because he has learned not to read reports and drink in the same moment. The early cups of coffee were not so fortunate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again inspired by Papapanda's wonderful art.
> 
> Check out his twitter feed, it's full of em: https://twitter.com/PapaPandamonium
> 
> Please comment if you spot typos or spelling mistakes.


	3. Somtaaw Shenanigans - Interlude 1

Raan cannot move his arms. They are tied behind this chair. He cannot move his legs. They are tied to the chair too. He cannot rock the chair. It is bolted to the floor. In front of him on the command deck stands Maasi Somtaaw.

He tries calling out, but the mask over his face muffles the sound. Even to his ears the sound is distant, nothing against the shudder of deck plates and callouts of the bridge crew.

It is with mounting horror that he sees clearer; all the bridge crew are replaced. Instead of the familiar sight of S’Jet, Manaan, and Nabaal he sees only Somtaaw. One nearer to him turns and grins, savagely. The face is familiar. Too familiar. The bridge is crewed entirely by Somtaaw Salvagers.

Raan’s screams redouble, but still, they are distant. Raan feels more than hears the subtle shifting of Kapisi: she has engaged all four reactors. No longer is she crawling along sedately. Kapisi is barrelling along the salt flats towards the distant dunes. Somtaaw crews cheer at the broken limits. Raan screams at the stress of the reactors climbing, at the unvented heat, at the carrier dying by degrees.

It is then that Maasi finally acknowledges Raan. He crouches down beside Raan, draping his arm over Raan’s shoulders. Maasi leans in, as though confiding a secret, but he only winks. Instead he calls out.

“Helm. Do a kickflip!”

Raan wakes in a cold sweat, the nightmare of Kapisi tumbling end on end etched into his waking mind. The arm of his latest conquest is paltry comfort.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by certain... Behaviours by carriers in Deserts of Kharak


	4. Somtaaw Shenanigans 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Audio logs from Operation Khadiim

Audio Diary of Raan Naabal  
Dated to the fourth day of Operation Khadiim, 1110KDS

“Well. I guess, that orders are orders. Audio logs aren’t exactly my thing, but, well.”

“This is 2nd Lt. Raan Naabal, gofer and general paperboy for Kapisi’s hangars. All of them. Well that’s a lie. I’m not really a gofer. But I still do get way too much paperwork. I complained about it once to the boss, the deck chief, the head honcho. All I got was a glare and dark muttering.”

“I’m not really sure what command has in mind with these logs, but I’m betting that the requirement is going to go out of the window once the boredom sets in. Also this is silly. Kapisi hasn’t even launched yet, what am I supposed to log? Salvager crews getting in trouble? Fuck it, I’m going to bed.”

“Hey baby, I’ll be right over…”

_Audio Log ends_

_Operation Khadiim start was officially dated at the launch of Sakala, Kapisi’s launch would not happen for another few months. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

Audio Diary of Maasi Somtaaw  
Dated to a few days before CDCV Kapisi Launch, exact date unknown, 1110KDS

_Audio log consists of a 12 second long sound which analysts determined to be a burp. It was likely performed by Maasi Somtaaw. The background noises have been determined to be the sounds of cans and laughter. The entire log lasts no more than 26 seconds. This is not the only log of its kind by Somtaaw crew members, perhaps indicating some sort of prank, or perhaps, knowing Somtaaw customs, a religious festival of some kind. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

Audio Diary of Raan Naabal  
Month 3 of operation Khadiim, Day of CDCV Kapisi Launch, 1110KDS

“Raan Naabal here. I have no clue which log number this is, and frankly I don’t care.”

“I have come to the conclusion that this carrier was designed to be perpetually unready. There are so many problems all the fucking time that the stack of paper on my desk is spilling. I wish I had a secretary. But no, not enough crew. Fuck.”

“Still, I guess it could be worse. People work hard, and damn it if the non-carrier stuff works perfectly. Only one breakdown so far, and that was during a salvager stress-test. Some guy called Maasi. Anyway. Despite the pressure I guess I’m pretty happy here. Good work, good people, _great_ sleep, hah. I should see if the S’Jeti are willing to fraternise at some point.”

_An alarm begins blaring._

“That’s… Not an alarm I know about. Weird.”

_There are a few seconds of silence, presumably while Raan Naabal checks his comm for the now infamous speech by the self-proclaimed K’Had Sajuuk. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

“Fuck.”

_Audio Log Ends_

Audio Log of Maasi Somtaaw  
Month 3 of Operation Khadiim, Day of CDCV Kapisi Launch, 1110KDS

_Maasi seems to have accidentally turned on the recording on his personal comm, and somehow filed it to his official logs, all while on the Primary Salvage Deck of Kapisi._

_What follows is a series of muffled orders, the sounds of salvager engines, various metallic noises, one specific sound marked as the Deck shutters opening, a long series of shouts punctuated by salvager engines and unidentified external sounds, likely those of Epsilon Base’s machinery, followed by the sound of the Deck shutters closing._

_Finally comes the sound of Kapisi’s main drive train engaging, followed by swearing and metallic clattering. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

_Audio Log Ends_

Audio Log of Raan Naabal

Dated to the fourth month of Operation Khadiim, after the Battle of Cape Wrath, 1110KDS

“Fuck. I mean. I know I complained about it, but Fuck.”

“Chief’s dead. Random ricochet from a railgun slug. Crews think it hit the Fore Port Deck shutter guard railing, outside; then it deflected at a weird angle, and hit a weak spot in the shutter. Those things are meant to be armoured fuckssake.”

“So the slug went through the shutter, deflected off the ceiling, and… Sajuuk above. It… It blew off the chief’s right side. He died before the medics got there.”

“I don’t even know what to think. I mean. I know that leaves me in charge of the Main Deck, but crap. How are we. How am _I_ meant to take charge? I expect the paperwork to come through tomorrow, but damn. Morale is not going to be good for a while. Everybody liked the Chief.”

_(An unidentified voice – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet)_ “Raan, you coming to bed or not?”

_(Raan once more, the other voice does not return. – First assistant analyst Kade S’Jet) _“Yeah, I’ll be right there. I just. Give me a minute, I need to do this.”

“Fuck.”

“I’ll be organising a vigil or a wake for the Chief… no, for Arran Naabal, Sajuuk guard him, when we get a chance. He deserves it, even if he doesn’t see the end of this.”

_Audio Log ends._

_Official Logs for Operation Khadiim note a shipwide vigil for the first death by enemy fire of the expedition. It took place two days after the Battle of Cape Wrath. Meta-analysis of other audio logs and crew rotas indicate there was a wake held in one of the hangars or decks on the same date. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

Audio Log of Maasi Somtaaw

Dated to two days after the Battle of Cape Wrath, fourth month of Operation Khadiim, 1110KDS

_Voice identified as that of Raan Naabal, this is the first occasion of the voices of Raan Naabal and Maasi Somtaaw appearing in each others’ audio logs. This is principal evidence of an unofficial wake for Arran Naabal. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

“Right, everyone here? Ok, listen up you lot!”

“Kapisi has just been through her trial by fire!”

_Cheers from the crowd. – First assistant analyst Kade S’Jet_

“It’s official! We’re going to make it to the Primary Anomaly!”

_Cheers_

“But first, a series of toasts!”

“First. To our brave crews and pilots!”

_Cheers_

“May they guard Kapisi well, and send the Gaalsien back to the desert!”

_Loud cheers_

“Second! To the deck crews! May your floors be free of engine oil and full of spare parts!”

_Cheers and laughter_

“And finally. To the memory of Arran Naabal!”

“May Sajuuk guide your steps into the light!”

_Crowd responds_

“Sajuuk Guide You Arran Naabal.”

“Naabal don’t have many rituals I’m afraid, so I’m going to have to apologise to the more religiously minded among you. However we do have one good tradition.”

“Yeah I can see all the Naabali grinning already, and a few others too.”

“I have here some beverages.”

_Cheers_

“I will not name who got them!”

_Laughter_

“But I will name Arran Naabal with every drink I pour for the next day!”

“So grab a drink with me, and toast our former Deck Chief Arran Naabal!”

_Audio Log ends._

_Sickbay mentions a surge in incidences of dehydration and a peculiar short-lived flu passing through the crew the next day. There is no official note or record of the wake occurring. Lt Arran Naabal was buried at desert with honours the day after the Battle of Cape Wrath. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_

Audio Log of Raan Naabal

Date undetermined, some time between the skirmish at the Kalash Valley and the Battle of Cape Wrath, 4th month of Operation Khadiim, 1110KDS

“Fuck. They made me Deck Chief for the whole damn carrier. That means I’m in charge of the flight decks and their damn catapult problems, the fore Hangars, the rear Hangars, and the fucking Ammunition Deck. And if that wasn’t enough I’m now a full Lieutenant.”

“I guess it’s a nice pay rise, but still. It’s more paperwork I don’t want. And on top of that there’s the weekly officers’ mess dinner, I’m going to actually have to put on some dress black-and-yellows. We’re going to be looking like a hive there.”

“Huh. Now that I think about it, the science crews are mostly officers, and upper ranks too. I don’t think I’ve seen any at the Junior Officers’ mess. Hmmmm. That would mean Rachel’s crew would be there. I should introduce myself.”

“Anyway. The deck is finally clear and tidy, and we’re ready for whatever the Gaalsien will throw at us. I will admit that I’m a little worried about the catapults, but the catapult crew have said they’ll have it sorted soon. Thank Sajuuk we packed a lot of spares for the trip. I’m just worried that they’ll last until the resupply. The deserts are not kind on our materiel.”

“Raan signing off, I guess. Time to head to bed.”

_Audio Log ends._

_While complaints about the logs are frequent it can nevertheless be considered amazing foresight that led Coalition High Command to order all crew to maintain them. From a historical perspective the insight into the conditions of the crew of Kapisi are invaluable for the developments and progress aboard the mothership currently in construction in orbit. From a psychological perspective I am assured that these logs also contributed immensely to the mental wellbeing of the crew during the expedition. – Lead analyst Anna S’Jet_


	5. Somtaaw Shenanigans 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Philosophical talk about the lad of quality: Raan Naabal

“So how about it then, huh, Maasi?”

“What?”

“You know…” Andrew waggles his eyebrows suggestively, “Chief Raan.”

“What about him?”

“Uh. Well, you know.”

“Oh, you mean about how he’s bedded half the crew of Kapisi and magically hasn’t left a trail of broken hearts everywhere he’s been?”

“Well, yeah. How do you think he does it?”

“Magic.”

“No seriously. How does he do it?”

“Sheer industrial Naabali force of personality.”

“If that was the case I’d expect far more ‘industrial accidents’ and that sort of stuff.”

“Yeah, yeah, laugh on.”

“I don’t have a clue. He doesn’t exactly boast about his conquests does he?”

“You two referring to those seductions as conquests definitely won’t help your case.”

“Hey Sara.”

“Hi Sara. How’s the crew?”

“Not bad thanks. The kid they pulled from Fleet Reserves is green as a polar pasture, but he’s quick enough. We should be fine.”

“Enough about me though. You boys were talking about Raan Naabal, right?”

“Yup.”

“Yeah we’re curious about how he isn’t yet dead hung from the control tower railing.”

“Bit of a mystery if I may say so.”

“Well boys, following the scriptures is one thing, but you gotta remember those Naabalis, they only do lip service. They aren’t good Sajuuk-fearing folks like us.”

“…”

“Snrk. Your faces there.”

“Look boys, just because he doesn’t celebrate the festivals like we do, and hasn’t walked the shimmering path, doesn’t mean that perhaps he isn’t just a little favoured by Sajuuk.”

“I never took you for one to be so faithful Sara.”

“I never took you for one to be so casual, Maasi, but look where we are.”

“You mean apart from inside of Kapisi?”

“Fuck off you know what I mean.”

“Yeah that’s true enough I guess.”

“Has he gotten to the science crew yet?”

“Hmm? I think he bedded that cute young S’Jet assistant fella the other day.”

“Wait hold on. I thought he was bedding that leggy pilot lady, you know, one of the transfers from Sakala.”

“Yeah, it sounds like he’s overlapping a little. What is up with that though?”

“I guess it’s partly his looks, partly his charm, and partly his massive equipment.”

“Wait what.”

“I’m joking, stop looking so worried.”

“That doesn’t really give me any relief.”

“Oh I bet it would.”

“Shut up Maasi.”

“Right. So. He hasn’t been crucified for fraternisation.”

“Yet.”

“Yet. He hasn’t had a noisy breakup.”

“Which is ridiculous.”

“He’s bedded how many women? Seventy?”

“Nah, that would be half the women in the expedition. More like forty. Tops.”

“Right. And he’s bedded a few men too. I quote ‘that cute S’Jet assistant’, isn’t that right, Sara?”

“Mhmm.”

“Pass me that beer would you, thanks Andrew.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Anyway. Right. By the numbers that means he’s bedded a solid quarter of Kapisi’s crew.”

“Eeeh, not quite. I’d say maybe 20%, one fifth.”

“Right. That’s still a stupid number.”

“How does he not walk around with an icepack on his crotch?”

“I think more importantly is how on earth he’s managed those numbers in just six months.”

“I know! Maasi is only impressed by the numbers, but I want to know how!”

“Look, Andrew, all I care is that my beer stash is left in my care, that nobody discovers the still in my ride, and that I get to keep tinkering with spare bits that we bring in.”

“Seriously, this guy. Sara, please tell me you got an explanation?”

“Big dick energy is my working theory if I’m honest. In fact, some of the techs on deck seven are talking about putting together an app to track who he gets up to.”

“Sajuuk’s Hand, that bastard is a mystery. Raan Naabal, lad of incredible quality.”

“I think he’s probably got a massive…”

“Fuck off.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. This is canon about Raan. Don't ask how or why.


	6. Somtaaw Shenanigans 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Creative Salvager blasting charge usage

Battle debriefs, records show these are from several hours after the "Battle of the Dune Sea".

Audio debrief accompanied by relevant written battle reports from relevant parties.

[Strike Fighter Pilot Anaya Sidiim written post-flight report]... We were Evac Winchester, we'd just made confirmed hits on several Gaalsien targets, Railguns if memory serves. That was when the all-call came on the radio notifying us of an aggressive skimmer move towards a hole in the ground picket line. Didn't hear anything after that, but I happened to see a ripple of explosions off the port wing, down on one of the dunes. I remember being a little confused because we don't have any weapons in the field with that explosion pattern. Landing was clean...

[LAV Gunner Yan Soban audio debrief] The All-Call came through and the lieutenant instantly re-routed us without command prompting us. We were the closest unit after all, it made sense, and we weren’t about to question it. The actual order from command came in later about, oh I reccon, a minute? Two minutes? It turns out the all-call was from a drone operator aboard _Distant Oceans_, you know the Baserunner crewed by Paktu. The operator had spotted a dust plume in sector, uh, sector 4 I think. Anyway that was a small hole in our defensive picket line. I say small, but it was still over a kilometre across. Anyway the all-call was given because there was potential access to our rear-line salvaging ops. We got there in good time, having used that nitro boost, but we couldn’t keep the speed up because of engine temperatures, so we had to limit to around 120km/h. We could see where the sandskimmers had been – they leave those really distinctive marks in the sand, like chevrons a couple metres across, with ripples on either side, kinda like sandsnakes but bigger. So we followed those, no questions asked, but we figured we wouldn’t catch them and we’d have to deal with a massacre at salvage site Echo. We really didn’t expect to find the sandskimmers coming back the other way, systems sparking from their weird auto-repair mechanisms. We gunned them down with no losses then re-routed to Kapisi which had by then shifted to cover the salvage site.

One last thing though, about a half-minute before we felt a few tremors in the chassis, a bit like when the bombers drop their load nearby, sorta like a series of heavy thumps, you know what I mean? I figured it was just a bit of the sand texture, but it could have been what caused those skimmers to be damaged.

[Sensors and Drone Tech Anastasia Paktu written AAR] …At the seventy-fifth minute of the engagement [in the Beladin Dune Sea] there was a sensors ping at picket line seven, the nearby drone, number 44547, had visual on that region. Visual contact was made with ten Gaalsien sandskimmers, colouring indicated belonging to the Ashoka Fleet. The vector of these suggested that they were intending to pass through a gap in the Kapisi Defence line in sector 4, which in turn showed a vulnerable salvaging party at Wreck Site Echo. The Officer Commanding of _Distant Oceans_, Pyotr-Sebastian Paktu was notified of this. He ordered an All-Call alert to be issued, which was carried out by Comms Tech Seva Paktu. The Officer Commanding of _Distant Oceans_, Pyotr-Sebastian Paktu followed this order with another order to begin tailing the intruding sandskimmers. I maneuvered the drone’s autopilot onto a heading matching the sandskimmers’ with a patrol rout upon Wreck Site Echo. At minute eighty-two of the engagement there was a series of explosions among the aggressing sandskimmers, recorded by the drone, the origin of which are unknown, this resulted in six sandskimmer destructions, the wrecks of which were marked for collection, and the damaging to an unknown extent of the remaining four. The surviving sandskimmers retreated at this point and were gunned down by the LAV squad which had responded fastest to the All-Call. The source of the explosions was not detected by the drone. I have set aside personal time to do an in-depth analysis of sensor logs and optical records. [End AAR]

[Science Team Audio Log] Right so this bit is definitely one of the forward units. What are we calling them now? Repulsors? No? Hover units? Hover units. Make sure Rachel gets that memo, she keeps changing the name. Tell her to stop. Oh, right yes. So there’s a bunch of fragments here, and these blast patterns in the sand here are really weird, and there’s some glass fusing as well. And there’s shrapnel that’s clearly torn through several skimmers which we can’t find. Latest theory on that is fused glass shards from the explosion which shattered after piercing the skimmer armour, but that’s pretty farfetched. The only other place I’ve seen these particular fragments is in Blasting Charges for demolitions work. Though I can’t imagine it to be possible to aim those given to the salvage crews that easily considering both the fuse delays and the slow arc. Either way we still have a fair bit of wreckage to catalogue to be sure. [End log section]

Maasi Somtaaw, yesterday.

YEET

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You see it sometimes in DoK multiplayer, a clutch demolitions charge use, suddenly those very scary looking sandskimmers are short of friends and wide open for a counter attack. It's a shame it costs 50CU a pop though. There were several pretty good instances in the latest Jaraci Cup

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Papapanda's sketch featuring a Coalition cruiser with Gaalsien float-bulb-things.
> 
> See his stuff on twitter here: https://twitter.com/PapaPandamonium


End file.
